paris

MIchael Jackson and Bubbles by Jeff Koons on display at Versailles, France 2008

Michael Jackson at Versailles

MIchael Jackson and Bubbles by Jeff Koons on display at Versailles, France.

MIchael Jackson and Bubbles by Jeff Koons on display at Versailles, France.

“I’d like to know who approved this”, my friend David said today of the Jeff Koons exhibition at the Versailles Palace. “I mean, I quite like his work”, he added, but wondered why this world-famous building was deemed an appropriate space to exhibit Koon’s famous statue of Michael Jackson and Bubbles.

“Maybe it’s because of the extravagance of the work. Or maybe he was influenced by Versailles?”, I wondered out loud, trying to understand myself. I mean there’s a certain extravagance in his work, and he uses a lot of gold leaf, but the works did seem kinda odd when exhibited against furnishings and art work with a definite eighteenth century feel to them.

As it was my final full day in France, David suggested we should visit Versailles. “Sure, why not?”, I thought to myself, recognising that deep inside I only had a knowledge of the palace because that’s where the peace agreement for the First World War was signed. Until I did some reading, I didn’t really know it was the home of the royal family for over 100 years, and that at one point in history, about five-thousand people had lived there.

With the memory of the signing of the Treaty of Versailles in my head, I wasn’t prepared for the size of the palace and the grounds. Nor was I prepared for the huge amount of tourists who were there today. Thank goodness David knew some of the shortcuts to try, and we avoided queues all of the day.

After lunch we went on an English language tour of the royal family’s private chambers during the reigns of Louis XIV, XV and XVI. As you might expect, they were quite lavish, though not as outrageous as I thought they might have been. Our tour guide, who was excellent, also gave us an insight in the human face of these royal figures, and of their own idiosynchrasies.

The story, for example of Louis XV (I think) who failed to take communion for over thirty years because he didn’t feel he could because of his own infidelity was a fascinating one.

As was the story of the transformation of the royal guards from being made up solely of foreigners (because they had no allegiances) to being made up solely of French aristocracy (as a good PR exercise for the many different areas of France, and to help the French aristocratic families who were finding things financially difficult).

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Unfortuntely, we couldn’t visit the private domaine of Marie-Antoinette, due to bad weather. As in Sydney, France had a terrible storm in 1999 which the authorities had failed to warn about. “Ever since then, they’ve over-reacted to any storm warning”, David told me, echoing the experience we have back home.

With the day cut short, David dropped me at the train station and we bid each other a fond farewell.

On my arrival back in Paris, I called in for a glass of wine to celebrate my final hours here. As I walked in to the nearby brasserie, my attempt to order a simple glass of wine failed. As in high school, when I elected to learn German not French, I’ve realised once again French as a language totally eludes me. I know the words, I hear the pronunciation, but everything just comes out wrong. So I’m back in the hostel, resting up and updating my blog.

Tomorrow is a really big day for me: I’m leaving to come home. I can scarcely believe my time is nearly up. A hideously long flight awaits me, broken up by a couple of days in Hong Kong, which I hope will be just the right medicine to ensure a smooth transition back to life in Sydney.

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Great Views of Paris

Eiffell Tower

Eiffell Tower

“Just keep walking, it’s a scam”, I shouted to the young tourist couple, hoping they understood my English. I knew something was awry when on the approach to the Eiffel Tower, I saw a young girl approach them, pretending to have found a gold ring in the sand and asking if it was theirs.

Just a minute or so earlier, an identically dressed young girl had done the same thing to me. As she bent down, “discovered” the ring and came towards me, I knew something wasn’t quite right. With one hand raised I ignored her approach, and with the other held tightly to my bag. Looking around to the right, I saw a young man who looked quite similar (an older brother I assumed by his appearance) who was closely observing the situation. I glared at him, and he looked back at me, recognising that I wasn’t about to be caught by their scam.

And then I saw the same scenario being played out again just a few metres up the track, I knew for sure my initial feelings were right, and that’s when I yelled out to warn the young couple.

In fact it was just the scenario M-H had described in blog comments a couple of days ago, where the tourist is distracted by one person, while another comes along and takes their bag. I hope the young couple took my advice, though I didn’t stay around long enough to see if they did, concerned for my own personal safety. And besides, I was in a hurry to get to the Number 1 tourist destination in Paris: The Eiffel Tower.

Not only is it a hell of a lot cheaper to walk the tower stairs rather than catch the lift (4 euros, as opposed to 11 – though I was also only charged 3 for some reason), but it was also a really great experience to do so. Similar to climbing the Sydney Harbour Bridge, in that you really get to see the tower’s construction as well as the magnificent views.

Even being a slightly overweight forty-year old, I didn’t find the walk too much. Maybe because I was so excited I literally bounded up the stairs. And I didn’t envy the people who’d paid a lot of money to be tightly squeezed into the elevator. Coming down, needless to say, was a breeze. In fact, a couple of young blokes had a race to see who could get to the bottom first.

In all, I guess I spent one-and-a-half, maybe two hours wandering around two different levels of the tower. I was extremely lucky too, since both the weather and the views today were spectacular. It was also great just to sit and watch people have a truly wonderful experience. Young families with kids. Couples in love. All having the times of their lives. And for a few of them I was “official photographer” of their wonderful moment.

The views were even better than those I’d had earlier in the day at Sacre Couer, the church not far from where I’m staying. There’s a lift there too, though it’s something I didn’t know about, and couldn’t take advantage of, since I was coming from the other direction. The view, though, is definitely the first thing you notice when you reach the top of the stairs.

And then you notice the beautiful church itself. And, since it’s a “working church”, a lot of people (including myself) took the opportunity for some quiet prayer in the midst of the tourist jam.

Outside on the stairs, it’s both peaceful and noisy. I first took a seat on the stairs near an American bloke playing classics such as “What A Wonderful World” and “American Pie”. And when that became too much (after about two minutes), I found myself another spot near a bloke playing the harp. He was good. Really good. And the harp also seemed to suit the scene a little more too.

I must have sat there for about thirty minutes (maybe longer) enjoying the peace, the solitude (well, kinda), and the views. And then a woman asked me if I would mind moving slightly so she could hold the railing to walk down the stairs. As I instantly recognised her French was as bad as mine, I replied, “No worries”. “Oh it’s so nice to hear an English voice”, she said to me. And when I replied telling her I was Australian not English, she told me that was just as good, and that her son was an Australian.

In some ways, it’s been a day of ticking off the tourist boxes of Paris, since I also paid a visit to Notre Dame. It’s just as touristy as everywhere else I’ve visited. And no wonder, since it’s a very beautiful church. Quite remarkable.

On the way there, however, I also discovered the great little “island” in the middle of the river. Well, discovered isn’t so much the word, as the island was full of people sitting enjoying the sun, reading, eating and drinking champagne.

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And of course there was some romance too. There were some teenagers tentatively holding hands. There were a couple of gay boys with their legs gently touching each other. And there was a lovely middle-aged couple holding hands too. I thought it was great to see a couple who might have been together for maybe twenty years or so quite happily showing affection in public.

Well, that’s what I thought until they decided this beautiful spot was also the ideal place to go for the “big pash”. And by that I don’t mean, a tender, passionate, romantic kiss. Hours later, the sight of tongues and hands going places they shouldn’t go in a public place still haunts me.

Not only has this one single event absolutely confirmed my homosexuality, but I think it’s also put me off sex for life. “If that’s what I look like when I’m doin’ it, then I’m never doin’ it again”, I thought to myself. I hope I’m not sounding too much like a fourteen year old teenage girl if I say, “Ooooh gross!”.

Anyway, that’s not gonna be an issue is it, since I’m staying in a youth hostel? I have, however, been lucky again tonight. Once again, I’m in a four-bed dormitory on the top floor all by myself. I’ve nicked the pillows off the other beds, so I hope no one turns up at midnight. I’ve got the window open. There’s a gentle breeze. The sounds of Paris traffic can be heard gently in the background. Could life get any better?

Post Script: I wrote too soon. Three other people arrived to share my room at about ten thirty. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Sunday in The Marais

Sunday in The Marais

Minding a car space for someone I dont know.

Minding a car space for someone I dont know.

“Oh my God, she’s going to ask for directions”, I thought to myself when the forty-something glamorous woman with a suitcase called out to me today. “Oh my God, how do you say I’m a tourist?” I thought to myself, as she beckoned me to stop.

She quickly recognised I was an English language speaker, and explained to me her car wasn’t far away, and asked if I wouldn’t mind standing in the free car space she had found while she went to get her car. “Only two minutes”, she assured me. With nothing else planned, I told her it wasn’t a problem, wondering for just a moment if I was being secretly filmed for French television.

A simple good act of kindness seemes to have returned some good travel karma, since it looks like I have an entire dormitory room to myself tonight at the hostel. I won’t jump to conclusions too quickly, since it’s not yet nine p.m. and there’s the chance of later checkins, but I’m hopeful of having a huge room to myself tonight. And to having the windows open! Yippeee. I’m on the sixth floor with quite good views over Paris, and there’s a lovely gentle breeze.

That wasn’t the case last night, when I shared with a Dutch couple and a Japanese bloke. Surprisingly, they were all early-risers. I woke early myself this morning and then went back to bed for a few more hours. It was one of those grey days you associate with all of those romantic images of Paris.

After the heavy tourist orientation of the last few days in visiting monuments, chapels and castles, I was keen for another day of hanging out in Paris doing some serious people watching today. And I figured The Marais, which is a reasonably fashionable part of Paris was just the spot to do it.

In a Sydney context, it’s kinda like Paddington meets Surry Hills, with lots of cafes, restaurants, fashion shops, people dressed completely in black (and white – eew, I don’t get that) and lots of poofs. So naturally enough, as I looked around while having a baguette for lunch, I thought to myself, “these are my people”.

Sunday in The Marais

Sunday in The Marais

I spent a couple of hours later in the afternoon in a bar called the Central Hotel. It’s kinda central, hence the name, and has the rainbow flag hoisted loud and proud. I also liked it because the bar staff didn’t seem to mind me making a glass of wine last a few hours without re-ordering,

Upon sitting down I found myself sitting right next two four Australians: a straight couple and a gay couple. They were obviously here for a trade fair or something like that, as they were later joined by a couple of other people.

When the sole French bloke joined their party they told him how beautiful Paris was, and what plans they had for the future. And then they began asking him questions about travelling to various locations around France, which he answered politely. But then I saw a really weird – and totally understandable – look appear on his face when they started to ask him more detailed questions. I actually heard one of the four Australians ask… “What time does the train go to Champagne and from what platform?” WTF?

It’s also the bar where I discovered French men aren’t universally attractive. For every French man who looks like Phillipe Olivier (Kylie Minogue’s boyfriend), there’s at least one hundred who look like Gerard Depardieu. And remarkably, like Latvia, every gorgeous woman seems to be on the arm of an incredibly unattractive man.

So that’s how I spent the day, really, sitting in the cafes of Paris watching the world go by. Can life get any better?