The First Year

This morning, I had the opportunity to chat with Hamish Macdonald on ABC Radio Sydney about a significant milestone – the first anniversary of my amputation. A year ago on this coming Sunday, I was rushed to the hospital, underwent a lower right leg amputation, and began a whole new chapter in my life. During the interview, I kept one key thought in mind: what valuable insights could I share with others facing a similar challenge? Hopefully, my story resonated and offered some helpful advice. On Sunday, I’ll share the written story, but right now, here’s the audio, and a fairly accurate transcript.

Hamish : And joining me in the studio this morning on 702 Mornings is our colleague James O’Brien. He’s a voice that you might have heard before. These days, he’s on the planning and strategy side at the ABC, but if you’ve been listening to ABC Radio for some years, you’ll know his dulcet tones, especially if you’re from the regions or you’ve got relatives in regional New South Wales.

James was on mic for more than a dozen years, delivering a daily radio program to those of you across the New South Wales regions. Over that time, he would have done lots of stories himself on diabetes, on disability, as well as things like overseas holidays. But just over a year ago, these three things really came together in a pretty extraordinary set of circumstances and turned his life upside down.

James has survived, though, to tell the story, and in fact today, well this week I think, he’s celebrating what he’s calling his stumpversary, which I feel like I’m not entitled to use. But anyway, James is here to explain. Good morning, James, how are you?

James : Hi there, Hamish. Yeah, stumpversary, I can say that. Other amputees can say ampuversary. Yeah, I’ve got to worry about it. Yeah, look, we can say it. I can say it.

Hamish: So explain stumpversary. What does it actually mean?

James : Okay, so on the 30th of June last year, I call it my end of financial year discount, I was taken to the hospital in an emergency situation and the lower third of my right leg was removed. It was the combination of a bunch of things, including an infection in my foot that just went a little bit crazy, sepsis, things like that, also diabetes. And even though it’s my individual story, it’s a really common one. The estimate is that something like 8,000 Australians each year will have an amputation. 160,000 in Australia, it’s growing at 2.2% each year. Three-quarters of men, because we don’t look after ourselves. And so it’s a huge issue. And in fact, in terms of diabetes-related amputations, we have the highest rate in the OECD. So I’m hoping by talking about this this morning, that I’m going to create a bit of awareness, particularly for men of my age, but also lots of other reasons that people have amputations too.

Hamish: You’ve written a beautiful account of your experience and your journey over the last 12 months, which will be published on the ABC website. And we’ll put that out as well if you’re listening to this and want to read more. But it struck me in your description of things that, I mean, I can’t even imagine receiving that news that you were going to have to have an amputation.

James : Well, I didn’t actually receive that news.

Hamish : Yeah, because you didn’t sort of explain that.

James: So what exactly happened is I’d been overseas with friends, and I got a bit of a cut on my foot. You know, I had a bit of an infection. And then the sepsis came through and basically started moving up my leg. Meanwhile, diabetes was kicking in, and I went into a bit of a delirium for several days leading up to the situation.

And then on the Friday, I was supposed to deliver some deadlines, which are very important for journalists to do. No one could find me. One of my colleagues, Joanne, raised concerns and tried to call and all those sorts of things. She and two other friends, Andrea and Ross, and my next-door neighbor, Alexis, then knocked on my door. No answer.

The police arrived along with two ambulances and found me unconscious on the floor. I don’t really remember. The only thing I remember of the night itself is Ross standing over me and saying, “It’s okay, James, we’re getting you to the hospital.” That’s all I know.

Then four days later, I woke up from a coma. By which time my niece had arrived down from Lismore. And thank goodness, she’s a nurse. So she understood all this stuff and was able to communicate. She said, “I had to summon up all the courage I had to tell you that there’d been an amputation.” And I didn’t give consent because I wasn’t in a position to do that.

Honestly, I was more off with the pain relief than upset. But I was also quite realistic: much worse things could have happened. Immediately. Yeah, I could have died. So there was a very strong risk of death and/or brain damage.

So when they, at St Vincent’s Hospital, removed the bottom half of my leg, there was the chance they might have wanted to remove more. But it’s remained as a lower leg amputation. They talked to my niece about going further, but thankfully that wasn’t required.

Hamish: You talk in your article about your experience of the sort of adjustment process in, you know, back into the world and returning to work and taking public transport. What’s it been like?

James : Look, at first I could hardly get anywhere. So I was still going around in a wheelchair until about October, November last year. I was in hospital and rehab for three or four months. At first I had a lot of support because I was in a wheelchair. So people see you coming up and they go, oh yeah, well, does this guy need a bit of support? And I did in those early days. The only thing that drove me insane in those early days, being in a wheelchair, were those hire bikes.

Hamish: As in the Lime bikes that get left out on the street.

James: Anyway, so people were parking them in the middle of the footpath. And so I had to go around them and those sorts of things. And, you know, I had friends to push me around. I also had some support from the NDIS in terms of getting out in the community and those sorts of things. But then as I’ve become more and more able, people just don’t notice me anymore.

Hamish: It was an interesting observation you made about being on public transport and because people are standing, you say people are looking on their phones and they don’t actually see.

James: No, they don’t. So I’m still wearing mostly shorts, because I can’t get my pants over my prosthetic leg. But this morning, I got on the light rail this morning to come in here and there were six people sitting in those wheelchair places on the light rail. I saw a couple of people look up and then look back to their phones and then finally one person said, oh, would you like to sit here? And then the others did as well. So, you know, I just think people kind of think, oh yeah, he’s got a prosthetic leg. He’s fine. He’ll get around. But there was a long period of adjustment.

Hamish: Do you ever say to people, hey, do you mind getting up?

James: Sometimes I do. But mostly it’s when someone else needs it as well. Like if I get on at the same time as an older person with a walking stick or walking frame or something like that, I’ll say, hey, get up, get up and let them sit down. So yeah, sometimes I do.

Hamish: So it’s a good reminder if you’re on public transport or using it. Look up or look down. But also if you’re going to sit in one of those seats that are reserved, make sure you get up when the time comes.

James: Absolutely. So that’s been an interesting thing. I’ve had a couple of people – some just don’t notice. And I had one person push me out of the way to find a seat in the theatre, which was a bit of a nuisance. And I had one person also with a pram who thought her SUV-sized pram was more important in terms of mobility.

But, you know, mostly people are really fantastic. They’re really great. They sort of look and say, you know, can I help you with something? And that’s a much better thing to say to someone in this circumstance. Can I help you with something as opposed to, would you like me to do this for you?

You know, because when you say, would you like me to do this for you? It sort of takes away your power. And I had a bit of an incident earlier in the piece with friends who wanted to do things and they said, we’ll go to your house and do this for you. And I really got quite shitty with them. And I said, look, no, I don’t want that done. It’s much better to say, do you need some help? Would you like, not would you, can I do this for you? It’s what would you like, you know? Yeah, right. So less specific, just be open, you know, to what’s needed.

Hamish: You’re hearing the voice of James O’Brien, a familiar voice here on the ABC, marking his, what he calls, stumpversary this week. What about the emotional side of it? Because you also mentioned friends and family, some maybe not quite believing how okay you have said you are.

James: I’d been to Cambodia and I’d met people who had lost limbs through landmines…

Hamish: This was the holiday immediately before?

James: Yeah, the holiday kind of made me a bit aware of these sort of issues already. And I thought to myself, wow, I’ve lost a limb in a first-world medical facility. It’s fine. I’ve got lots of support around me. It’s fine. And look, two years earlier, my family had survived the Lismore floods. So I just thought, this is absolutely okay. But lot of people thought I was in denial. And, you know, at the hospital, I had a psychiatrist come and talk to me and she was concerned that I was in denial. And look, you know, maybe at some point there’ll be moments when I’ll go, you know, what has happened to my life? But, you know, I’ve been okay with it. But some people get really upset. When I was in hospital, there was one young guy who’d also had an amputation and he was in tears all the time. So, you know, people respond in different ways and there’s no right way. There’s just the way you respond.

Hamish : What about sport and activity and stuff like that?

James: I was never very sporty, but I have been to wheelchair basketball a couple of times. And there are some young women there who are just amazing. There’s one who found that a prosthetic leg wasn’t for her. So she actually just gets around with crutches, which just does my head in. Personally, I just know I couldn’t do that.

There are other people in much worse situations. I’ve been part of some international Facebook groups, which I’ve had to stop going to because they were just too upsetting. Particularly the American ones were really upsetting because of their health system there. They don’t have the NDIS (National Disability Insurance Scheme). And I was just reading these people saying, oh, look, I’d really like to get a prosthetic leg, but my insurance won’t cover it. So I’ll be praying to God to get a leg, to which I would say, well, you know, in Australia, we just pray to Bill Shorten and the NDIS can help out. So that’s been a really interesting thing to deal with. I’ve also seen and talked to people on these Facebook groups about, you know, much, much worse situations than me. So I feel fine about it all, you know.

The only thing I sort of worry about is ongoing relevance. And I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you a slightly naughty story. It is a slight naughty story. You know, obviously, you know, I’m 58 years old and, you know, I have wondered about my attractiveness as a man having lost a leg. And I was in an Uber recently and the Uber driver propositioned me,

Hamish : What rating did you give? Five stars?

James: Oh yeah, absolutely.

Hamish: Great to see you. Thank you for sharing the story. And as you say, so many of us don’t think about some of the critical things.

James: Can I say there’s one organization I’ve been involved with, which is called Limbs for Life, which is a national support agency for people. It’s a peer support agency. And maybe two or three weeks into my hospital stay, I got a phone call out of the blue from someone who lives in Newcastle called Clay. Very, very similar circumstance to mine.

Hamish: And it was just great to talk to other people in this circumstance. A text from Zoe says, James is the best. Back when I worked at the ABC, he was always so kind to me. Knowledgeable, funny, interesting. Sending him all the best. I don’t know if you know who. I know exactly who it is. James O’Brien, thanks very much.